


Clouds

by TopOfChaplin



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-26
Updated: 2013-10-27
Packaged: 2017-12-06 13:44:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/736337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TopOfChaplin/pseuds/TopOfChaplin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A young man comes along who's had a rough past. Thomas is given orders to keep an extra eye on him by the Lord himself. But Thomas is damaged too, and what no one knows is that what they need is not acceptable. Not in 1920, and Downton Abbey is no exception. But the sky is quickly changing, and everyone will feel it as the clouds roll in. A dangerous change casting its shadows over the abbey.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cumulus - Part 1

_~ **Cumulus clouds** are puffy clouds that sometimes look like pieces of **floating cotton**. The base of each cloud is often flat and may be only 1000 m above the ground. The top of the cloud has rounded towers. When the top of the cumulus resembles the head of a cauliflower, it is called cumulus congestus or towering cumulus. These clouds grow upward, and they can develop into a giant cumulonimbus, which is a **thunderstorm cloud.** ~ _

"Thomas, you'll be skipping dinner, his Lordship wants a word with you this instant," Mr. Carson barked as he entered the kitchen.

Everyone had been seated and Mrs Patmore has just served the stew, but all stood as the butler entered. Faces turned to Thomas, who was keeping his head bent. He let go of his napkin and left the kitchen, the others getting seated again, fussing at once over what could urge the Lordship as to not let it wait. It was unusual at Downton that the upstairs bothered the staff during their meals, after all they only had three a day, and worked hard. Only in situations of utter crisis would they summon the butler, or if needed, the valets.

"Now, now, you eat. I'll deal with this matter but be sure to leave some supper," Carson finished before he left the downstairs once again.

Thomas took the stairs in a swift and met the Lord in the dining hall. "Thomas, please follow me outside for a moment will you? No need to retrieve your coat or mine, it'll only be a second."

Thomas gave Carson a glance, but if Carson knew something of the matter, he did not give it away.

It was not cold, chilly maybe but not unpleasant. Almost too hot to be the start of November, but Thomas didn't have another moment to blunter over the weather, for just down the pat from the great entrance stood a shadow. It was too dark for Thomas to see much, but it certainly had to be a young man considering the hat he was wearing. There was a suitcase in his left hand, and he was eyeing the surrounding grounds.

"This," his Lord spoke to Thomas. "is James Kent. He's..." the Lord paused.

Thomas turned to the Lord, waiting the explanation.

"James is the son of a woman who passed away years ago. She was the woman who saved me and my family. James has been living with foster parents but has been working since he became of age at the residence of my cousin. He'll be second footman here, something slightly different from what he used to...work as."

Thomas listened, but he still waited to know why he was summoned especially, and why this James Kent wasn't sent to be introduced to Carson first.

"Thomas, this is a very rare situation, and I'm going out of my usual common sense and behind the rest of my family to help James. I owe this woman that much, and I owe James that as well. Now, I want you to look after Jimmy, as I cannot do such a thing from my position. You may report to me anything particular, but for the most time I just want to know that he'll be good off, and I'm putting my trust on you. I know of your situation Thomas and I also know you've had a hard time making fit of that life. It is not for no reason that I want you to be the one looking after him. Don't get me wrong, he's no child but he's still young. He's also had a hard life, and I believe this position at Downton Abbey will make him content. Maybe also happy."

Throughout the Lord's conversation, Thomas had yet to say something. He'd been studying the man who now seemed to be inspecting the abbey from another standing point. Thomas focused on the Lord again, giving a nod. "I understand your Lordship."

"You must also, not for any reason or in any situation, speak of anything I confided in your tonight. That could certainly cost your job. But I must know straight away if you're up to this task Thomas, or I must find other ways to keep this smooth."

Thomas straightened, his many years in service teaching him not to be shocked by anything, rather see it all as opportunity and challenge. "Most certainly your Lordship. I shall take Jimmy-I mean James here under my wing and teach him myself."

"It's important that you not let him know of my concern. He must not know he's being treated any different than the rest of the staff. Not that he is, but this is, as I said, a rare situation. That's all I had to say. Now, if you would please follow him inside and be present with him when formalities are being fixed with Mr. Carson. I suppose he can meet the others and get settled tomorrow. Tonight, I want him to know that he can count on you Thomas."

"Yes my Lord," Thomas replied.

Lord Grantham called James over, and Thomas got to have a proper look at him for the first time, as he stepped into the dim light from the windows. He was indeed a young man, but Thomas quickly took note that he probably was a few years older than he seemed, being half a head shorter than himself and quite slim. As he lifted his gaze the shadow from this hat slipped, and Thomas was met by clear blue eyes and full lips. With a small smile and a nod of his head Thomas greeted him.

"Welcome James, this is Thomas Barrow, valet of Matthew Crawley. He's been here for some time so I decided he'd be fit for showing you inside."

"Thank you Lord Grantham. I look forward to work for you."

James took his hat off, showing off blonde kept hair, set for a curl resting on his temple to the right that Thomas couldn't stop staring at.

"Well then I'm off, good night."

And Thomas and James were left.

"Let's get you inside, let me take your luggage, you must be tired from the journey." James followed him inside, silently but willingly letting Thomas aid to this belongings. It could hardly be much, for Thomas found the case light and immediately thought how James had probably not made a fortune at his old job, for there surely were no nice clothes save those he arrived in.

"We'll head straight to Mr. Carson. He's the butler and your work superior. After you'll dine with me and Carson seeing as we've not had a chance yet. Then I'll show you to your room. The rest will be taken care of tomorrow."

They were approaching Carson's office, and with a knock Thomas let them in as he answered. Papers were settled, tasks instructed and room and fitted clothes given. Thomas suspected the Lord had given Carson notice of the arrangement with him and Jimmy, but that he knew no further detail, for Carson did not ask why Thomas was accompanying him, though he kept giving Thomas glances of curiosity. Carson hated being kept in the shadows of something going on downstairs – he was a man of charge for sure. Thomas couldn't help feeling satisfied that the Lord had given him a task even excluding Carson, so he had no way to keep up with it to see it through.

"Well then I guess you are settled James. Now let's have supper."

Mrs. Patmore had left the food heating at the stove and three plates out, but it hadn't been a secret that a new employer would arrive one of these days. Dinner passed silently. Usually neither Carson or Thomas were the ones to chatter while eating, except when someone remarked something Carson wouldn't tolerate listening to while enjoying his meal. Thomas kept glancing at Jimmy, who only ate half is portion, but neither he or Carson commented on it.

"I'll settle for night then. I'm taking it Thomas will follow you to your room. I'll see you bright and early for breakfast as your schedule says. I'll take you through the rest then and have Thomas show you around. Welcome on board."

"Yes Mr Carson. Good night," Jimmy replied, and Carson left the two alone in the silent kitchen.

Thomas cleared their plates and out of the corner of his eye he saw Jimmy once again scanning his surroundings.

"Never been in such a big house, it's quite a place," he remarked and Thomas looked up.

"Yes, well, we're all quite privileged to work here. His Lordship, Mr Crawley and Mr Branson are nice people. Not so sure about the women, but I guess Lady Sybil is all right. Should watch out for the old Lady Grantham though, you never know where she'll take your mistake gossiping around."

Jimmy absently held onto a chair. "What about the other staff?"

Thomas turned then, finished with the clearing. "Well, I'll leave it up to you to see for that. You'll meet them all in the morning, and then see them every day after that." Thomas took his luggage once again from the hall and showed Jimmy to the boy's sleeping area. "Here's your room, you have the washing room just across from you, and mine's the one two doors down." Thomas entered the room and flicked the light on, also starting the heating. "You'll find your uniform in your closet as well as towels and anything else you'll need. I'll show you all the other rooms and what you need to know tomorrow. Then we'll start your training."

Jimmy placed his coat and hat on the bed and slumped down beside it.

"Jimmy?" Thomas questioned him, stepping closer. His eyes shoot up to him then.

"No one calls me that any more."

Thomas didn't know how well the Lord knew him or the other way around, but he kept from telling him that's what the Lord had called him as he'd spoken to Thomas. "Mind if I do though? It suits you."

Jimmy only shrugged. "But how come you'll be showing me everything, didn't Lord Grantham say you were a valet?"

"Indeed yes. But that's quite recent. I've been first footman for most of my time here. Lucky circumstances moved me up, so to say." Thomas didn't bother laying out the Bates story now.

"I see."

Thomas was staring at the loose lock of hair on his forehead again, and he really wanted to twitch it between his fingers, so this was the moment to leave. "Well, I can see you're tired so I'll leave you now. If there's every anything..." He trailed off. "Anything at all really, you can come to me. Carson is not always very understanding and well, it must be very serious to bring it up to the Lord. And I'm a tight seal if you want me to be. I've orders of that. You can trust me Jimmy." He gave his shoulder a squeeze to imply it, but Thomas sniggered himself for that thought. He also really wanted to touch him, feel his skin if it was really as smooth as it seemed. And those lips. He silently both damned and praised him for being so beautiful.

But this one was dangerous. Even more so than usual, given the Lord's personal attachment to Jimmy. Thomas was certain there was one, ever so slight. There was some history with Jimmy's mother, history that probably even Jimmy knew limited about. No, Thomas really had to watch it this time. He gave Jimmy a last rare genuine smile, Thomas' one of many this night, before he went to leave.

"Wait." Jimmy had stood up and was walking over as Thomas turned, hand leaving the door knob. "I could really use some pain relievers, I got a hit to my shoulder earlier."

Thomas furrowed his brows, wanting to question how that'd happened. "Let me have a look."

Jimmy began to shake his head, "Really, it's nothing serious-" but Thomas cut him off.

"I'm a trained medic from the war. Let me have a look." Holding Jimmy's eyes for a moment, he finally gave in with a sight, backing a step and opening his waistcoat. Opening the buttons of his shirt he slid it off his left shoulder, giving Thomas a look at his slightly toned chest, all smooth skin like his face. Then he spotted his blue shoulder and dragged his shirt down further to see it running down several inches on his back along with a nasty cut that had stopped bleeding. "Shit, who did this to you?"

Jimmy wouldn't reply, trying to get his shirt back on. "It doesn't matter does it? I'm not going back there if I can help it." He was harsh now, voice cold. He'd seen a lot of ugly Thomas understood.

"Let me clean the cut and cover it. It could start bleeding again if you get any friction on it. I'm sure nothing is broken or you wouldn't have been able to still use your arm."

"I've had worse." Jimmy muttered but seemed to regret it a second later, gaze plastered to the tiny window in the corner of the room.

Thomas couldn't help his feelings of pity. He himself had been in the war almost three years, Jimmy had been in war what seemed all his life. "I'll be right back." He brought pain relieving medication, hot water and a cloth, and patches.

"Cut isn't deep so not likely anything that could develop infection. I'd still like to check it again in a couple of days and to change the binding."

Jimmy had removed his shirt all together and was sitting on the edge of his bed. Thomas drew up a chair from the corner by the closet and started trailing the damp cloth over his wounded backside. A few minutes later, having felt across the bones as well, he declared himself done. "Take the pain relievers and go to bed now. If the shoulder bothers you tomorrow please let me know."

"Yes. Thank you Thomas." Jimmy was putting on a white shit to sleep in and Thomas made it to the door.

"Good night Jimmy."

Jimmy looked up at him as he turned in the door. "Good night."

Thomas let his gaze linger another moment, holding Jimmy's, before he closed the door behind him. Finally in his own room he hurriedly rid himself of his clothes, sitting heavily onto the bed and resting his face in his hands. Whenever he closed his eyes he saw Jimmy's face. Deep blue eyes, pink lips, freckles over his nose that he'd noticed as he'd patched up his back. His kind small smile, haunted look of impassiveness when he'd shown him his shoulder.

Thomas didn't sleep well that night, his dreams were not filled with scenes of him back in the war, but rather Jimmy stuck in a house of a battlefield. Waking with a start the next morning, shooting up from his bed, he found Jimmy opening his door to a creek, peering in. "Thomas?"

"Come in," Thomas replied, voice raspy from only just waking up. Forehead damp from his livid dream.

"I'm sorry to disturb you this early, but I want to make a good impression my first day, and would like to know if I am decent." Jimmy stood straight, hands behind his back. Hair was kept like last night, still the little twirl of hair hanging loosely. He'd dressed in the dark green footman uniform, and Thomas had to admit he looked better than any other footman Downton had seen in years.

"Mm," Thomas kept inspecting him, but didn't allow himself to look too long and got out of bed, retrieving his own black uniform. "You'll do. Remember, it's your composition and words that count the most. Well, second to doing your tasks properly. The upstairs are the ones to impress, but Carson will be the one throwing daggers if he's not pleased with your work or attitude." Thomas got no response as he got his clothing ready and turned with raised eyebrows at Jimmy.

"All right, anything else?"

Thomas wanted nothing more than to warn him of certain...people, including himself, but he went for his old tactics instead.

"Jimmy, I will not give you any privileges that other newcomers haven't received. Now, get your arse down in the kitchen and let me get dressed. I'm a valet, and I have to be ready for Mr. Crawley in thirty minutes." His tone was slightly harsher than he'd meant, but Thomas knew he couldn't let his façade slip. The others couldn't know anything of these arrangements if he didn't want his miserable life to turn even more miserable. Keeping his tensed back to Jimmy as he replied.

"I apologize for my intruding. I'll leave you then."

Thomas didn't really feel bad, it was necessary after all. And Jimmy was tough, like himself. He couldn't stop thinking of the way the Lord had looked at him as he'd spoken of Jimmy, or the cold hard look upon Jimmy's features as he'd exposed his beaten shoulder. He hated knowing that he'd been given a huge task by the Lord, a task that now seemed like it would break him even more. He had to slam the wall above his washing bowl with his good hand. Otherwise he was sure he'd strangle the Lord when he saw him later for putting him up to this. He needed a smoke before today's work started, and decided for once to skip breakfast.

Outside the morning was grey and dull, heavy clouds hung low, but it wouldn't rain. It fitted his mood so well he could've chuckled. Instead he took a last deep inhale of the pint before tossing it on the ground and stepping hard on it. Just where the Lord had been standing last night upon Jimmy's arrival.

It seemed fitting.


	2. Cumulus - Part 2

Cumulus - Part 2

_~ **Cumulonimbus**  is a dense towering vertical cloud associated with thunderstorms and atmospheric  **instability** , and that occur from Cumulus clouds. ~_

_\- - -_

"Now Jimmy, I expect you to remember what we went through this morning. You'll be doing the dinner serving today along with Alfred."

"Of course. I'm a quick learner Thomas," Jimmy replied in a modest tone as they were walking downstairs for lunch.

Thomas hadn't asked Jimmy about the greeting of the staff at breakfast, and Jimmy hadn't shared. Thomas would leave it to him for now, he had his own appearance to keep up around the others. As they entered they kitchen Ivy and Daisy were chattering about Jimmy but silenced as the two men entered, giggling to themselves. Jimmy gave them both a small smile, not shy, rather reserved, Thomas noticed.

"Now you two, help me get the food on the table will ya? It ain't moving itself." Mrs Patmore spoke to the kitchen maids with an extra glance in Jimmy's direction. She was not the first one to do that today. They were all curious to why an inexperienced footman had been given position with an Earl. Thomas seated himself in his usual seat and Jimmy sat down across from him. O'Brien and Alfred entered then, and Alfred sat next to Jimmy, already chatting away with him about the upcoming weekend.

"Ey Jimmy we might get Saturday afternoon off Carson says. The family is heading to dinner elsewhere. Thought we could head into town. Swooning of pretty girls that day a week," he spoke with a cheeky wink at Ivy.

"Don't you have better to do in your spare time than checking town girls up?" Daisy plotted in, noticing his flirting with Ivy.

Jimmy shrugged with a smile."Why not. Need to see this place other than the inside of the house."

Thomas pretended to busy himself with the days newspaper, sipping a strong coffee. He hated it when it got stale. "Careful not to catch trouble yet Jimmy. Alfred 'ere is a bit of a troublemaker."

"Thomas doesn't know how to humour himself. He's best at throwing nasty comments at people and smoke."

Thomas didn't even look up from the paper as he spoke. "Ivy dear, pour me some new coffee will you?" He gave her an honest smile as she did.

"Thank you," he empathized the words and gave Alfred a snug smirk, who frowned down on his plate. O'Brien watched it all from her seat at the far end, drinking it all and storing it up for a later occasion. Like she always did. It used to turn to trouble for someone at a later occurrence, but it had been weeks since she and Thomas had got conflicted when Alfred had showed up, pissing Thomas over the brick, and she had yet to bring something to the open. Alfred was less than pleased at Thomas' encounter with Ivy, and remained silent and grumpy through the rest of the meal.

Thomas was naturally good looking and could be charming when he wanted. Alfred was interested in Ivy, but Thomas observed her growing curiosity for Jimmy.

"Jimmy would never say such things like that Alfred. He's a proper gentleman," Daisy spoke, and Ivy nodded agreeing. "I'm sure you'll be a great footman with such charms and positive attitude," she told him all smiles.

"Oh well I do hope so. I like it here already." Jimmy kindly replied. Yes, Thomas could see how he would be likeable among the staff, and if he pulled off in his work as well he would surely be welcome to stay. Something about that fact should make him Thomas' natural enemy, but he was certain even if he didn't have it as an extra duty to look out for him, he'd want to help him. It was not like Jimmy threatened his position, and the downstairs had good of some fresh air breathed into it. Alfred and Ivy's recent joining hadn't exactly brought much but tension and juvenile drama.

There wasn't much to report during lunch. Mrs Hughes made small talk with Jimmy, and every now and then Anna, or Ivy would question him something. Thomas was starved when the food was served, yet he couldn't seem to eat much. He left the table at first chance and stepped outside in the back for his usual midday dose of nicotine.

"Can I have one of those?" a voice Thomas had been installed to like spoke behind him only a few minutes into his peaceful break. Thomas let out a lazy puff of smoke and turned slowly to gaze at him before retreating his head to scan the field in the distance.

"Not a chance. You're not a smoker."

"I've smoked before."

"Maybe, but you don't smoke."

Jimmy stepped up beside Thomas, who was leaning against the stone fence that parted the back area of the kitchen from the grounds. He didn't say anything but he was daring Thomas with his eyes. Thomas watched him for a moment before taking a long drag and dumping the pint, and exhaling him in the face. Breathing in the cotton cloud of smoke, Jimmy gave the tiniest cough and Thomas smirked, stepping past him before he did something ridiculously stupid that his imagination was running wildly through his mind.

"Don't do bets with Alfred, and don't take anything O'Brien says seriously. That's not advice, it's an order," Thomas told him over his shoulder.

"And how do I know it's not you I shouldn't listen to?" Jimmy replied baldly, but there was amusement in his tone. Thomas turned before the door.

"Maybe you shouldn't. But if I were you I would. For if you do, I can promise you the things I'll be teaching you the rest of the day will give you a free pass to first footman within the end of the month." Thomas went to go back inside, but caught Jimmy's grin over his shoulder first.

"Oh, and you probably shouldn't tell any of that to Alfred if you want to be saved of days of whining and sour blunter your way."

The rest of the day went by in a blur and its usual busy manner. By the time dinner was to be served upstairs, Jimmy proved himself exceptional, and Thomas didn't miss the nod of approval from the Lord. As they were clearing away and setting the table in the kitchen later, Thomas gave Jimmy's good shoulder a light squeeze, whispering "You can thank me later."

Jimmy smiled back, obviously pleased himself, but he did nothing to brag of it as he was complimented during the meal.

"You might not have the experience, but there is surely nothing that seems to show that you were not cut out for a job as a footman Jimmy. You certainly impressed upstairs tonight. Carson received positive words from both Lady Mary and the Lord himself." Mrs Hughes told Jimmy, her kind smile directed at him.

Carson cleared his throat. "That is true Mrs Hughes. But remember this was only his first day. Now, we'll see how it goes the next few weeks. He has still things to learn, and more challenging tasks to meet."

Mrs Hughes gave him a look and he added, "But your first day could definitely have been a lot worse."

Thomas felt like snickering to that, but it was Carson's way to say he was pleased, and there was no need to ruin the good mood around the table tonight. Alfred even gave Jimmy's back a good slap, not knowing Jimmy's outstanding meant stepping down for himself yet. Thomas had to bite his inner cheek to not throw a comment on the action to Alfred as he saw Jimmy wincing ever so slightly from the contact.

It was late and everyone had headed to bed, but Thomas waited up for Mr Crawley's return from London and went to the kitchen for a cup of tea. Surprised, he found Jimmy sitting by the old piano.

"You should play something," Thomas spoke, trying for casual as he waited for the pot of water to boil.

"It's late."

"You should play."

"Someone might be disturbed."

"I want to hear you play."

Jimmy didn't turn his head but he could still see Thomas in his side view. Slowly he started pressing the white and black keys. The tune was most beautiful Thomas noted, yet so sad. He'd never heard it before still it made him think of himself as a young boy. Confused, scared, having nightmares about the grand clock in the house that would tick faster and faster. And angry. He'd been so angry at his father when his mother had died. Angry when he'd sent him away to work. Angry at a God he'd never really believed in.

Now his pulse was too high, throbbing against his neck and hammering in his chest.

"Stop,"

he found himself blurt out, but Jimmy kept playing.

As the tune drifted off, lingering in the air, Thomas' tea was long forgotten. Jimmy stared at him as he stood, but Thomas couldn't focus on him, eyes staring into the air. Without a word Jimmy left, and a few minutes later the bell summoned Thomas back to present. Taking a deep breath and fixing his clothing, he headed off to meet Mr. Crawley in the entrance hall.

"Mr. Barrow, thank you for waiting up."

Laying in bed later Thomas stifled his sobs in his pillow, not even knowing any more why he was weeping, but he couldn't stop. All he knew was that Jimmy sat with his faith in his actions, for Thomas had tried and failed yet again to not feel. But all the time spent concentrating on not feeling had left him shallow and empty. Space that Jimmy had crawled into since his hopeful eyes had met his own outside the front door of the abbey, a seemingly beautiful man, with something locked up inside.

In the room two doors up, Jimmy sat on the floor, back to his bed, glancing at the clock on his night table as it ticked close to eleven, trying to keep his hands from shaking. Checking four times that his door was locked, before he fell asleep on the floor, clutching his pillow. Pocked knife within arms length.

* * *

"So you were in the army," Jimmy confirmed as he stood in Thomas' room the next morning.

This time on Thomas' request. He hadn't had the time yesterday to ask about his shoulder and did a quick check before Jimmy completed his dressing. At Jimmy's words, Thomas' eyes left his work on his collar, immediately going to his hat hanging down on the wall opposite his bed.

"Front first, wounded, and then an army doctor. Ran Downton a time at the end."

Thomas didn't like to speak of the war. Mostly because of the triggered memories from the front, but also his inner struggle as he returned. He'd been most head high with pride for leading Downton when it had wounded soldiers. But mostly it was a constant reminder of his own cowardice. The cowardice that had saved him, and the bravery that had killed so many others, or damaged them beyond repair.

"So I've heard. Ms O'Brien spoke rather fondly of your time in leadership."

"Bet she did."

"You know, none of the others quite understand why I bother to talk to you. Say I'll be good off when I'm finished trained for my job."

Thomas went to comb his hair back, never meeting Jimmy's eyes through the mirror. Thomas had waited for this, waited for the fall back from the other servants. Not even O'Brien was to be counted on now, though Thomas suspected she'd never really been more interested than to build him up to watch him break, and to have someone to share her sniggering with at the time. And steal fags from, surely she owed him greatly. Jimmy stepped closer.

"What a surprise." Thomas said indifferent.

"But they don't understand you do they. And you think I don't understand so you push me away. Better arrogant than weak, better mean than broken," he whispered to each of Thomas' ears, and his grip on the comb tightened to the point of pain in his palm. In his bad hand.

Jimmy's gaze left the mirror as he turned his back. Thomas bolted up then, realization dawning on him "He did this to you did he not? Came into your room at night and beat you to blood."

"Trying to beat sense into me he said." Jimmy didn't turn again as he spoke.

"You don't like to speak about the war because of fear. I don't like to speak of my war because of fear of meeting it again. I think we can leave it at that Mr. Barrow." His voice was soft and strained, but utterly composed.

And from that moment Thomas had the slightest of respect from the young footman. For Thomas knew pure stinging fear, and he would never, ever forget it. Getting up Thomas crossed the room in three swift strides, halting only centimetres from Jimmy.

"Let's stay out of the battlefield then shall we?" Jimmy nodded.

"Now, we have another day waiting and I'll be showing you the rest of your duties today. Starting with number one, a lesson in not being fired: know when to remain silent and never listen to any orders from Ms. O'Brien."

"Thought we'd established the O'Brien trouble already."

"Well, it's worth mentioning again."

"And remaining silent when found guilty of Carson is a must?"

"Excellent, I can see your way to success already James Kent."

"Well if it were to come to that, I do own it all to my outstanding teacher."

"Keep thinking that thought."

Jimmy could not remember the last time he'd felt so bright, having something to look forward to. And Thomas could not remember the last time he'd smiled as carefree and honest, and it almost scared him, but only almost for it felt too good.

* * *

"There'll be thunder tonight Jimmy, I'm sure of it. Care to join me for a walk then?"

Jimmy strained his head up to look at Thomas as they walked through the servants hall to the kitchen.

"I suppose, must be jolly to take a stroll in such lovely weather," Jimmy mocked.

Thomas snickered. "Not really. But it is a lot more fun to inspect the powerhouse when you can actually turn the power back on."

"Oh."

Mrs Hughes came out of her drawing room then and gave them both a knowing look. "Not putting the poor boy up for any mischief I hope...Mr Barrow."

He smiled strained at her as she left them to follow behind.

"Are you though?" Jimmy spoke with a hushed tone, but there was lightness in it. Thomas did not get to reply before Carson spoke up.

"Thunder you say, I haven't seen a dark cloud all day. Better show him something useful, like how to go to bed at a proper time. Nothing is worse than having to tell the footman to not fall asleep when he's serving breakfast," he trailed off with a hard tone, looking directly at Alfred who looked down, ashamed. Jimmy stood straight, waiting for a lesson of his own, and Thomas was quite amused.

"Certainly Mr Carson. Better not let him have that night off this weekend, I'm sure he'd be spending it...not sleeping," Thomas humoured in. Mr Carson seemed to contemplate it for a moment, giving Thomas a stern look before eyeing the guilty party.

"Best thing I've heard all day Mr Barrow, and to think it coming from  _you_." He empathized you with a pause before continuing. "Alfred you'll be working Saturday night, and I will not hear any objections. And if I'm pleased with your work I'll consider it again next week. Now, lunch before the bell rings, we have work to do as Lord and lady Grantham are preparing their journey tomorrow."

Lunch went by, and Thomas kept a discreet eye at Jimmy, noting how he had both ears in the depths of the table conversations. Mostly listening to Carson's ongoing concern for the next big dinner when there'd be visitors from Scotland in a few weeks, already making cleaning schedules. Alfred was silent too beside Jimmy, though for obvious other reasons.

As they strolled out after supper, Thomas questioned him about it. "Why you were all ears earlier at lunch. Anything up your sleeve already?"

Jimmy shrugged, pulling his coat tighter, gazing up in the dark. "Just trying to fall into things. A listener learns more than a speaker."

"I suppose."

Thomas lightened a smoke.

"Seems you were right about the thunder, and I must confess, I'd like to know how you do it."

"Do what?"

"Predict it. Read the weather signs."

"Could've been lucky guess for all you know."

Jimmy met his eyes with raised brows. "But it wasn't."

Taking a long drag, Thomas replied.

"No it wasn't."

Then he smirked before speeding up. "And it'll be drizzling soon enough too, so hurry up." Jimmy shook his head, slightly amused, but hurried along as the cracks of thunder broke through the sky for the third time.

"Bloody hell how do you know what's what in this moulder?"

"You don't, not really. But this is the main switch, always try that one first if the power goes. And if not, then you start somewhere and go through them all until you find the right one."

Jimmy was peering over his shoulder, standing on his toes. "You suppose it'll go out tonight?"

"It might. The wide open surroundings prove this the point of most power shut downs probably in all of the county. Though if it's the main power line it usually recovers on its own." Thomas checked the rest of the fuses before closing it up. Jimmy was peering out one of the two small windows facing towards the abbey.

Thomas dared to take a strike.

"So what did you do then, in your former employment position?"

"Oh bits of that and some of this. I didn't have any specific position, used me for whatever they preferred." Jimmy's voice was distant again. A fact Thomas gladly would have exploited had he been anyone else.

"Seems a bit...chaotic if you ask me. Would have thought the house of one of the Earl's acquaintances would be of more order."

Jimmy laughed coldly then, absent mindedly drawing on the fog on the corner of the glass. "I'm sorry for intruding on the subject again."

"Yes well, I suppose you are curious of my...experience." The way Jimmy said those words sent chills down Thomas' back, and another rumble of thunder broke the stretching silence. The rain was coming down heavy now and Jimmy smirked.

"Okay how 'bout this, you reveal your hidden talents and I'll tell you some of mine."

Thomas took a seat on some wooden boxes that read  _'Property of British army, Medical Section'_ , that had been stocked here two years prior or so, and thought a second of the irony in that.

"Hidden talent, and who said I have such?"

Jimmy shrugged. "Oh none, but everyone has."

Leaning back and straightening his hat, Thomas thought for a moment. "Well I'm a fair enough dancer I would say. And I know how to repair clocks. I'm also brilliant in cricket, and chess if I want to be. And I'm a good liar too I suppose, or maybe it's just everyone else who's terrible at interpreting and reading people."

A breathing pause. "Now you."

Jimmy left the window. "You sure you want to know though? I'd have to sworn you to secrecy of a lifetime."

The chills returned to Thomas of Jimmy's tone, and when he looked up to meet the eyes of the valet, Thomas swore he saw Jimmy's lip quivering for a moment. "But first I have to know if I'm right."

"Right about what?" Thomas' voice sounded weak to himself, and maybe a quarter of an octave too high.

"Your preference. Of...people."

Thomas' heart was beating wildly by now, but it wasn't even a secret what Jimmy was about to confirm. With Thomas' slight hesitation Jimmy had his confirmation.

"You're different as they so hesitantly calls it, but you can't help it can you?"

Thomas couldn't look Jimmy in the eyes any longer.

"Oh but Thomas you are not the one who should be uneasy. You see I have talents. I'm a great baker for one, and an excellent fire maker. I play piano and violin and sing. I can entertain with card tricks too. Oh, he liked that very much my former employer."

Jimmy got up and waltzed over to where Thomas sat stiff.

"But there were other talents he cherished even greater. Talents he'd give me rewards for. Dinner for instance, if I did exceptionally well. And a rare time he was more than sated he would let me go a few days without a mark upon my skin."

Thomas was fighting the urge to run but kept still as a rock, eyes glued to the ground. Jimmy leaned down, voice sounding strong but foreign.

"Yes indeed Mr. Barrow, I have such great talents. Wouldn't really come handy as a footman though would they, or perhaps they would. Wouldn't you know, Thomas."

The next second Jimmy's cheek stung as Thomas slapped him hard, and then Thomas was out the door and he didn't even bother to turn and collect his hat that fell off in the process.

Jimmy stood breathing hard behind as the sound of the thunder echoed off the sound of Thomas' last steps out and into the storm.


	3. Altocumulus - Part 1

 

_**~ Altocumulus** may appear as parallel bands or rounded masses. Typically a portion of an altocumulus cloud is **shaded** , a characteristic which makes them distinguishable from other cloud types. ~_

Part 1

 

“Could I have a word with his Lordship,” Thomas said as he bolted into the drawing room the next morning, and it was more as a statement than a question. He'd waited only long enough for them to finish eating, and Lord Grantham wrinkled his brows, Lady Mary and her Ladyship also eyeing the valet – concern etching their looks.

“Mr. Barrow I don't think this is the proper time-” Mr. Carson started saying from his place by the door, but the Lord cut him off.

“Yes if the matter is urgent certainly. If you would follow me to the north library.”

As the door was closed behind them the Lord took a seat by his desk. “My Lord-” Thomas started but the Lord cut him off.

“I want you to know first Thomas that if this has anything to do about Jimmy's past I wont hear of it.”

Thomas went silent at once and the Lord sighted, digging in one of the drawers and pulling out a letter. “If you would just tell me my Lord, was this any form of blackmail?” The Lord turned to look at Thomas as he spoke. “Not at all. What I told you when Jimmy arrived is the truth, but I'm afraid that is all I can tell you.”

“But why bring him here to work? I'm certain another place would have been more suitable-”

“Nowhere else would have been suitable Thomas.”

The Lord's tone was harsh now and Thomas looked down. “I believe he has told you then, who his former employer was.”

Thomas nodded. “More or less, yes.”

“And I hope you understand that by keeping an eye out for him you have to keep whatever he confides to you secret.”

“By all means yes my Lord.” The letter in the Lord's hand was put back in the drawer and locked.

“He has a dark past, but he's not a bad person. And I hope you will come to discover that as well Thomas.” The Lord stared longingly out the window, and Thomas could almost read a form of sadness in his gaze. Though he could not be sure, for he'd seen so much raw sorrow, the Lord could almost be interpreted as indifferent compared.

“I shall leave you then my Lord.” With a bow of the head Thomas left, but not without a last glance at the second drawer and the key the Lord held tightly onto.

-

Thomas didn't see Jimmy before after lunch time as he was set to polish glass in the drawing room as the family paid a visit to the Crawley house. Thomas entered to prepare the room for guests later when he stopped in his tracks upon seeing Jimmy. Thinking about turning to leave Thomas headed for the door again but changed his mind the last second and closed the door behind them. Jimmy carried on facing the windows in the room and Thomas watched his back for a moment before coming to stand beside him.

“Use the other side of the clot or you'll scrub your hands raw with effort.” Jimmy gave him a quick wary glance but did as Thomas said. “When you're finished meet me in the music room,” Thomas spoke in a low but serious tone, and Jimmy knew better than to question him.

Thomas left the room and went downstairs, meeting Daisy as he entered the kitchen. “What's James on about? Promised he'd help out cleaning in the kitchen.”

“James was instructed to do work upstairs this afternoon Daisy. I suggest you haul Alfred with you, he's been slumbering' in the backyard for the past hours,” Thomas said in a bored tone. He was exhausted spending half the night pacing his room thinking about the affairs the previous night. O'Brien came down the hall, a wicked smirk upon her features and her usual sneaky attitude.

“See you 'ave your preference ready. Don't think I don't know Thomas. When I told him 'bout ya he didn't even seem surprised. You been on to him already 'ave ya?”

Thomas' jaw tensed. “Oh but for once you are completely mistaken O'Brien.”

They didn't get to anything else for Mrs Hughes was approaching them, eyes tight and arms at her hips. “Now if you two are just standing around you may just as well help Mrs Patmore in the kitchen. Everything is having a shine up before Christmas.”

“You'll have to excuse me Mrs Hughes, I am needed in the music room.”

Mrs Hughes looked at him but dismissed him, and then on to Ms O'Brien. “I suppose you are not needed anywhere Ms O'Brien. Her Ladyship will ring the bell when she's returned from the Crawley house. We all must lend an extra hand now and then and I believe it is your turn.”

Thomas smirked at O'Brien behind Mrs Hughes back, who looked displeased to the point of whipping out at him again, but she was called for once again from the kitchen and took off.

“Mr Barrow if I could just have a quick word before you go,” Mrs Hughes said as she returned, catching Thomas halfway up. Thomas willingly went back downstairs and Mrs Hughes took him into her drawing room. A small smile hovered on her lips and Thomas was profoundly confused, waiting a banter as usual. “I'm glad to see you taking James under your wing. Mr Carson and I have not been told much of his situation but we know he's had quite a different life than the rest of us. I was afraid he wouldn't be up for the work but you've taught him well Thomas. I hope to see this continuing. Now, I was to say from Mr Carson to take the afternoon off. Both of you. Just be back again at seven sharp for the dinner serving.”

“Are you sure Carson said that?” Thomas smirked and Mrs Hughes shook her head with a small smile. “Oh you know how he is. But I put in a good word for you. Thought he could need a little time off before the Christmas rush starts. I know a little kindness now and then Mr Barrow.”

“Thank you Mrs Hughes.” She turned her head a bit, studying him for a moment before shaking her head. “Oh I don't think I'll ever get the hang of you, but don't go do something wicked to disappoint me.” Thomas only gave a wry small smile and bowed himself out. He was already making plans in his head and maybe they were not up to impose trouble, but they were certainly not entirely legal. But then again Thomas never counted on being caught, and the times when he was, well, he was only human after all. And then again his position had never been safer so he supposed he could get away with quite a bit.

“But work another hour first, it's not even two o'clock,” she ordered in her usual respectable manner. “That was the plan Mrs Hughes.”

-

“Why did you summon me here? I hope you don't think I'll give a demonstration.”

Thomas was confused for half a second before following Jimmy's gaze to the violins in the corner. “Oh no, quite the opposite.” Jimmy was the one to be confused now. “Winding the clock. First footman should know how to. I'm interested in your violin playing though, I'll let his Lordship know you'll be playing on the next concert.” Jimmy gave him a look with raised eyebrows before he looked away.

“Come here,” Thomas ordered at last as silent tension began easing its way into them. He knew he had to bring up the situation in the power house sooner or later but for the moment he let it be. “Now, put your hand on the big needle and feel the resistance.”

Jimmy did as he was told. “I feel it.”

“Good. Now, listen.” A heartbeat and then another.

“What am I listening to?”

Thomas leant over him, placing his lips dangerously close to Jimmy's ear. “Its soul, it speaks. Don't you hear?”

Jimmy smiled huffing as if he'd told a silly joke.

“Oh well, probably a good thing I'm the only one who can hear it. Mostly the clocks in this house just nag about the boring business goin' on in the rooms anyway. They particularly seem to have something against old Lady Grantham. Couldn't dare to think why.”

Jimmy gave a tiny laugh and Thomas couldn't help but think him beautiful, and he couldn't let go of the blood boiling thought of anyone hurting him. After showing him what to do if the clock went too fast or too slow, he revealed the news of the half-half day they'd been given. “Must be little work to do today or something. Or maybe they're tired of your face downstairs already,” Thomas said lightly as they made their exit from the music room towards the attic.

“Don't care, just eager to get outside for a while. I don't suppose there are any horses nearby?”

Thomas stopped as they entered the boy's hall. “Why, you fond of them?”

Jimmy shrugged, “I'll tell you all about it if you'll show me some.”

“Very well then. Get changed and we'll go.”

-

The first hour of their freedom was spent walking the frosted grounds and visiting the nearest stall where they borrowed a brown horse with a long white star on his forehead. Thomas learned a horse had been Jimmy's coping as his parents had died leaving him alone. He also learned that Jimmy loved spring and reading and hated walking if he could run instead. He couldn't swim and he feared rifles. Thomas told him about his drawing habits and love for unicorns no one knew. And making the dull life in the abbey excitable, telling him about particular incidents that would have sent Carson off his feet had he found out about them.

Thomas was leading them down to the river not far from the house, where Jimmy fastened the horse to a tree before pulling his jacked closer. It had turned noticeably colder today that yesterday, and the clear weather earlier had sunk the degrees lower. Thomas had a cigarette ready in his mouth, the first since they'd gone outside, Jimmy noted.

“Like this place. You can only just not see the house, and no pats run around where cars rustle or wagons come rollin',” Thomas said, putting his hands in the pockets of his hip length grey coat. Jimmy patted the horse and went onto the small brew, watching the river running slowly, halted by ice along the banks.

“He never kissed me,” Jimmy said out of the blue. Thomas stepped closer, also watching the stream. “Said he parted his personal slaves from his affairs that way. I was there to please him when no one else was.”

Thomas took all the information in but kept mute and tense, and completely still.

“Often spoke fondly of a raven haired footman at Downton Abbey, but he never said what you two had.”

He paused a moment, retrieving a stone from his trouser pocket and throwing it in the smooth water, breaking its fluency for a few seconds before it continued on as if nothing had disturbed its running. “So I did as he said, whatever he said, and it made me cry in the beginning for I was drawn to him and I wanted to kiss him. I tried once and he brought the whip out. So I never tried again.”

Thomas spoke for the first time since Jimmy's opening up. “Thought we agreed not to set foot in these wounds-”

“I owe you an explanation. And then I trust you for some wild reason.” Jimmy's voice shook with emotion and he threw another stone, this one smaller. Thomas took another step and they were side by side. He threw the cigarette in the water, that he had only taken two drags from.

“He promised to take me with him when he was last visiting, eight years ago now. Then he changed his mind.” He lifted his gaze to look at Jimmy. “I could have killed him knowing what he did to you,” Thomas confided, bitterness etching his words. Jimmy broke the slight eye contact they'd had, but let his left hand hanging in the airspace between them.

Wordlessly and as if it was the most natural thing in the world, Thomas reached his over and took Jimmy's shaking hand in his. He could feel how raw and bruised his knuckles still were. And then Jimmy let himself cry for the first time in months, for someone understood him, someone knew and someone cared. And maybe he wasn't fucked up beyond repair after all. And then Thomas never let go of his hand.

-

Thomas always thought he'd build up a heart of stone during all his years at Downton and after the war, even though he wore his emotions on his sleeve. It was his way of protecting himself from breaking again, to keep going everyday. And then Jimmy showed up all wounded on the inside and out, and Thomas promised himself to not get attached. He hated when he couldn't keep his own vows.

“I spent countless hours reading his letters to you that he never sent. He always addressed to you as, my dearest.” Jimmy stopped loosening the strap from the branch to look up at Thomas. “I kept wondering if you were really as handsome as he described you.”

Thomas would have smirked had it not been for the look of pain upon Jimmy's features. Jimmy looked away abruptly, getting the horse ready. “Then suddenly a week ago the Duke wasn't in his room when I went to him, and I was told I'd been offered a job here. No idea where he went or what he's doing but he was moving away for some time. I suppose he must have left a very good reference on me though. Then I started wondering if the Duke's heart breaker was still around. And there you were, just as he described you and cherished you in the letters.”

Thomas had loved the Duke once, but he'd been hurt and abandoned. And now so many years after he meets Jimmy who's sweet and kind even after being a victim of abuse for an unknown amount of time to Thomas. Thomas might be a troubled soul, but Jimmy was a broken one.

But somehow Jimmy was strong, stronger than Thomas, and Thomas knew that. Jimmy could smile and laugh around other people while Thomas held everyone at arms length, unable to express happiness when everything inside him had crumbled. Jimmy got onto the horse's back, and Thomas wanted to tell Jimmy that the bastard of a Duke hadn't done him anything good and that he was placed at Downton for other reasons than the intentions of the Duke. But he knew he had to keep the Lord's words confidentially to himself if he wanted to keep his job.

Petting the horse's head for a moment before he said, “Go on then Joey, go on then boy,” and giving him a final weak slap by his front legs so that he started walking.

“I didn't know you knew any of the horses,” Jimmy asked amused as he and Joey tripped away from the river and up the field.

“No not really. But my unicorns know them so then I know them a bit as well.”

Jimmy smiled, a full teeth smile that reached his eyes, before he and Joey went full trot, and due to the wall of fog descending because of the cold the last half hour, they were soon unclear in the distance to Thomas. Finding another cigarette he went after them in his own pace, glancing at the sky now and then. A tug in the corner of his lips, almost a small smile formed as he made his way over the grass where he heard Jimmy shouting encouragements to Joey as they sped up and rounded Thomas in big circles.

“Enlighten me then,” Thomas said with amusement in his voice as they closed up.

“What, to boost your big ego?” Jimmy mocked, cheeks flushed from the cold. None of then had bothered with headgear as there was no one else to see them.

“Oh trust me, it hasn't been given much to go on lately.” Jimmy halted the well-trained horse in front of him.

“Well Mr. Barrow, you are not a bad sight. And you are most definitely more handsome than I could have imagined. I do not think the Duke's words did you justice.” Jimmy's tone was light, playful, but then his features turned serious and he slid off the horse's back, patting it and whispering for it to stay. Thomas watched impressed as Joey stabbed his left front foot on the ground once and stood halted on the spot.

Jimmy came closer, eyes bright in the cool air, hair tussled from the riding. Thomas was again struck with his youthfulness, but the wrinkles between his brows revealed his lost innocence. “I'm sorry for the things I said yesterday. For a moment I wanted to see you hurt for I knew you were the one who held his heart. I regretted it at once when you were out the door for then it hit me. I never envied you for the right reasons. And I hate him for doing what he did to me. My hands were tied, my life depended on him keeping me in his service. I would never have wanted to stay with him now even if he changed.”

“I'm sorry I slapped you,” Thomas replied, hesitantly bringing his hand up to the cheek it'd connected with the previous night. For a moment he was about to pull back though, but the longing he saw in Jimmy's eyes froze his movement and his hand hovered millimetres away. Waiting another heartbeat to see if Jimmy would wrench his head away, giving him the chance to back out and leave nothing between them. But Jimmy kept his eyes at Thomas' and Thomas let his fingertips trail down his cheekbone before pressing his palm to the rosy skin.

A thousand warnings rung in Thomas' ear but he dismissed them all, caught up in the feel of the soft skin and the lazy gaze of Jimmy. Their moment was interrupted with Joey's whine, and Jimmy laughed. “Go then boy, come here.”

The fog would condensate soon Thomas concluded as the shadow of the abbey was becoming clearer in the distance.

“Hopefully we'll be able to see bubbly clouds soon as the weather clears up again,” Thomas said with his head pointed slightly up.

Jimmy was up in the saddle again and holding Joey in a grip long enough to answer. “I'll teach you some Latin words later if you indulge me on your deducting ways.”

Thomas lowered his eyes to meet Jimmy's. “Fair enough, if those will be handy words.”

immy only smiled, kicking his heels lightly into the brown stallion, before shouting as he left, “Non plaudite., modo pecuniam jacite. Ave atque vale.”

The sound of hooves echoed through the landscape long after they were out of sight. Thomas stubbed the third cigarette today that was only half finished.


End file.
